I get asked all the time what actually makes up each shibari style or how they differ. The answer to this is not always simple or easy to give, but when I was talking to my Ukete about this very thing the other day, she said it so beautifully that I asked her to write it down.

Osada-Ryû is certainly one of the most famous styles, and Yukimura-Ryû has also found its home in Harukumo-Juku.

The following texts are exactly as she sent them to me and I would like to make them available to you as well with her permission. My understanding of the Shibari styles has greatly expanded through this conversation.

Yukimura-Ryû

This type of bondage is a great challenge for me and represents submission. The interaction is often reduced to a minimum and the signals that come from you to me are subtle. When I close my eyes, I often feel completely alone. Because you leave me alone in my head. I have to endure the “silence” and pay attention to every little thing. And every time I have to decide for myself whether I wait or not. Whether I try something or not. Each instruction I do receive from you feels like a release. A salvation that you control, and like one dying of thirst I receive it. You are the center of what happens, or doesn’t happen.

It becomes very difficult when you force me to turn away from you. I can’t see you, I can’t feel you, and when I try to turn my face towards you, you push it away with your foot. Yukimura-ryû hurts in the soul, not physically. The emotions take place in my head. And you, as my Bakushi, know that. Why else the comforting words and gestures? When you start touching me again and our interaction finally increases, it is overwhelming and characterized by a very special kind of pleasure. I am at a loss to finding suitable words to describe my feelings in these moments.

Because this way of tieing is so intimate, it feels all the more revealing when you push my top down and everyone can see it. Especially when I’m only wearing a handcuff. I could get up and walk away. But I don’t. There would almost always be enough room to turn away. The shame is not in being exposed, but in giving up. Somehow, one allows it to happen. It’s a voluntary submission and everyone can see it. In retrospect, this is often difficult for me to accept. Sure, you would stop or sanction me, if I left my assigned space. But I haven’t thought that far in this moment for a long time.

Osada-Ryû

This way of tying represents devotion for me. It becomes quiet in my mind. It is like a release. It is the compression, the helplessness and the pain. All that takes the place in the head where otherwise the thoughts are.

They are anchor points on which I can concentrate so strongly until everything around me disappears. The others in the room no longer exist. Only this situation and these feelings that you then trigger.

It’s liberating because I haven’t had the responsibility for a long time. I can let it happen. This also means that I can allow the desire and the passion. No matter who else is present. Boundaries no longer seem to exist. It’s like a rush that hits me completely unexpectedly and I absolutely don’t understand where that comes from. It is no less intimate than Yukimura-Ryû. But I can find safety in the ropes and in helplessness. You don’t submit, you are submitted. For me personally, it’s much easier.